von Hottie: The Blog

The time aerial silks gave me whiskey leg

I think I can now definitively say that the New York Trapeze School is not my favorite place to take silks classes. Everyone is too professional, too advanced, and way too confused by my “I’ve got a year to learn this” schtick. They ask me if I’ve introduced more protein into my diet and if it’s for weight loss. NO! It’s so I can be awesome! GOD! No one understands me. It reminds me of when I was in 7th grade and was cast in the high school play. I’d show up on Upper Campus for rehearsals, totally pumped, and then they’d dress me in a pinafore and put me in the background. Mortifying. 

On the plus side, I had my own silk for the whole class. I was so nervous, I totally bungled my climbing, but the instructor was impressed with my Man on the Moon and side lean. She showed me a new trick for wrapping my split footlocks, which took me 20 minutes to master, and earned me praise for my tenacity. She also showed me how to wrap my single footlock in the air (if you can do that, you are playing the big kids for real). I was great at hanging on, great at dropping my butt, but every time I let go of my left foot, my right foot dropped to the ground like a dud. Totally flaccid. Like I have whiskey leg or something. Thanks, right leg. Now they know for sure that we’re underage.

(Original Article.)